My office looks out on an alley with another office building no more than 20 feet away. Across the way, is a man sitting in his office. His back is toward the window (and us). His blinds are mostly drawn. He is, without a doubt, masturbating to internet porn. Apparently, he's been at it all day. He even has headphones on. And the best part is that his office door is wide open.
I just wanted to share that. It's the sort of thing you see on the televisions all the time, but never in real life. Yay!
UPDATE: He's STILL at it. Yesterday, it was funny; today, it's sad. I feel bad for the guy. Not because we've seen him (or because I'm reporting his masturbatory habits to my readers), but because this is clearly someone who's had a bit of a mental break. I feel like psychologically stable people don't masturbate constantly at their desks with their doors open. (But please feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.) Is there a hotline for this?
(I changed the headline because I thought it was a more appropriate song lyric than yesterday. I think that it's a nice amalgam of humor and concern.)
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2 comments:
That's funny. It's like the naked fat guy on "Friends" (when I used to watch it).
But, are you SURE that's what he is doing? I mean, I'm sure you've run through the possibilities, but I'm curious what led you to this conclusion....
His back is toward us and his screen is 100% perfectly viewable. The images thereon are, without question, nude women and/or people in sexual positions. Although no one has, as far as I've heard, seen the goods, we have definitely seen his arm moving up and down. Unless he's training for a left-handed arm-wrestling competition, he's doing what we think he's doing.
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